2001-05-11 - 9:56 p.m.
#58: No Need for My Own Silent Battle
Note to self: Recently played and finished Metal Gear Solid. Extremely short game, and some missions are beyond frustrating (well for me, at least. O.o I'm not used to such sluggish controls as compared to a mouse on these kind of third person perspective games) but was thoroughly impressed by the developing storyline that skirted the fine line between beautifully poetic and boringly longwinded, and managed to fall into the former. Although admittedly the cutscenes are long as hell. At least it wasn't utter shite like some other games which had an (over)ambitious director at the helm. Ah, I haven't been this satisfied with a games story and conclusion since Starcraft. No wait, Half Life. No.... Planescape: Torment. Well, Giants: Citizen Kabuto had a fine and funny storyline too.... Hmmmm.... Now that I think about it, I guess I'm a little bit too easy to impress. o.O
Well, my mother came back today with my grandma from Canada. An especially inauspicious return, since I was still asleep and didn't greet them at the door. And on top of that, the only chore I actually DID manage to get done was washing up the dishes. -_-;;;; No vacuuming or mopping of the floors, no mowing of the lawn. Ummmm... I was busy? ^^;;; Right.... Anyway, it was at this point that my mother discovered we also had, on top of everything else, rats in cupboard under the kitchen sink. @_@ This is the first time we've ever had rats, and it was under my watch. Oh dear. Guess who's not going to be looking after the house again for a loooooooooong time? eheh. She also found out about the AAC having a meeting here, which isn't surprising considering the cheesecakes she found in the freezer, the excessive number of empty soft drink bottles and the small, discrete increase in snack foodstuffs in the pantry. Damn, she's good.
So overall, a pretty bad way to welcome back your mother after she's gone away on a two and a half week trip. I'm just glad it rained a lot, otherwise she'd have also come back to dead garden plants around the house. Which would not be good. I'm glad she's back, but now I guess I'm going back to the old habit of pretending like she doesn't exist. She occupies her side of the house and I occupy mine. I'm not sure, but I don't think this is how a family unit should operate. Today we sat down to dinner together and I never sit down to dinner with my mother. Only reason I came out was for the sake of appearance for my grandmother. Of course, this didn't change our usual topic of conversation between us, which was absolutely nothing. Dinner was very quiet. In the end we had to turn the TV on to get some "colour" into the room. Pathetic. At this rate, I'm not sure if I can tell my mother what I told my father last week. -_- And the presence of grandma doesn't help any either. I always feel so awkward around people who are meant to be my close relatives. Usually, I know very little about them (and they about me), which makes conversation difficult. Because we're meant to be close and yet we're virtually strangers to each other at the same time. I hope that sentence makes sense.
It's this pseudo-closeness that I dislike. We're blood relatives, yes, but that does that immediately make us close? I mean, my grandmother came into the room earlier in the day and told me I should really step away from my computer occasionally and concentrate on my University work. It's a fine sentiment, even though I haven't told her or mom about my decision to quite my current field. ^^;;; But then she goes on to say to work hard "for her". What? I hardly know her. Why should I work hard for someone like her? She doesn't know me, I don't know her.... We hardly exchanged words when I visited Melbourne, Australia. In fact, I made such little impression on her back then that when I first greeted her today the first thing she said was "You've grown so tall!". Over what? The height I was just 3 to 4 months ago? I'm pretty sure I'm over my growth spurt from my teenage years at this point. O.o
I think I'll stop writing here. Badmouthing my own relatives just.... doesn't feel right. Besides, I'm probably taking this way too seriously, I mean she DOES happen to have a large number of grandchildren to remember. O.o I just feel kinda edgy today, that's all. Like I wanna fight. Yeah! GET MAH FIGHT CLUB GEAR ON!
